Internet supports man for donating “unavailable” parenting book from brother-in-law


Members of a popular internet forum rushed to defend an expectant father accused of humiliating his brother-in-law on his birthday.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA**hole, Redditor shared u/Throwthe4257 (aka the original poster or OP) with several heated reactions with his sister’s husband, explaining how a recent birthday present fueled tensions .

Titled, “[Am I the a**hole] for giving my [brother-in-law] a parenting book for his birthday and embarrassing [him] in front of everyone?” the post has received nearly 7,000 upvotes and 700 comments in the past 10 hours.

The original poster states that he regularly visits his sister, who has two children and is seven months pregnant.

The original poster also said that when he and his wife revealed they were expecting their first child, his brother-in-law caused the exciting announcement to be ruined.

“Mine [brother-in-law] does little to nothing around the house or even childcare,” OP wrote. “My sister is 7 months pregnant [and] he keeps having her lift heavy things, run after the kids, bathe and cook for them.”

“He claims he’s not normally that ‘unavailable’, but since it’s ‘football season’ he has to catch up with all the games,” OP continued. “I got annoyed… especially after he… wife by asking my wife if ‘she’s sure I’ll be a decent father’.”

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For his brother-in-law’s recent birthday, the original poster said he struggled to choose a present, but eventually found something perfect and waited for the perfect moment to gift it.

However, that moment turned out to be yet another interrogation of the wife of the original poster.

“[He] didnt stop nagging my wife about the pregnancy and said there is an 80 [percent] chance I’ll turn out to be a floppy dad,” OP wrote. “When it came time for gifts…I got up [and] gave him a book on parenting… called ‘The Gift of Failure’.”

“He just glanced at me and rushed off…my sister ran after him and came back later and said he had calmed down after she saw the [TV] at a football game,” OP continued. “He later emailed me saying I embarrassed him and mocked him in front of everyone and demanded that I apologize publicly.”

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On the Internet, family and marriage websites have examined tense relationships between in-laws and offered possible solutions to a host of related problems.

But while Family Education and other outlets recommend individuals remain unbiased about their in-laws and set boundaries if necessary, tensions between in-laws can be more complex and often unavoidable.

Recently, News week has reported on numerous Reddit threads detailing furious clashes between brothers-in-law and other family members, including a brutal and public takedown similar to that of the original poster, and an additional pair of threads in which two scorned sisters-in-law exchange their sister-in-law husbands for their childlike and ” incompetent” behavior.

In all three cases, Redditors sided with those willing to face an annoying and angry brother-in-law, praising the mental strength required to do so.

Members of Reddit’s r/AmITEA**hole forum defended a man who gave his brother-in-law a parenting book for his birthday.
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In the case of the original poster, the reaction was largely the same, with Redditors praising OP for fighting back against his brother-in-law’s actions.

“[His wife] must stave off his tantrums with distraction…like a toddler,” Redditor wrote u/that_ginger927927 in the top comment of the post, which has received nearly 11,000 upvotes.

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“Surely [not the a**hole]they added. “He needs a wake-up call.”

Redditor u/ExcitementGlad2995, whose commentary has received more than 3,500 votes, echoed that sentiment and shifted some of the blame to the sister of the original poster.

“She may also need a wake-up call,” they wrote. “The route [he] acting ensures that she has three soon to have four children to take care of.

“I hope she starts to realize that and decide if she wants to be a mother/wife of an adult,” she added.

In a separate response, which has received more than 1,000 votes, Redditor u/Katana1369 also commented on the sister of the original poster, but unlike u/ExcitementGlad2995, she held her husband responsible for refusing to help at home.

“He projected his bad parenting onto you,” they wrote. “You can embarrass him every day simply by being a good father.”

“I feel so sorry for your sister, but she has clearly chosen to be a single parent, despite the fact that the father of her children is there,” she added.

News week has contacted u/Throwthe4257 for comment.


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