The internet laughs as it defends a man who “embarrassed” his girlfriend’s Italian family by speaking Italian.
Posted on Reddit’s r/AmITeA**hole forum, a man under the anonymous username u/aitaITAM1990 shared his story to get the opinion of the “AITA” community. The viral post has more than 22,000 upvotes and 1,000 comments.
The original poster (OP) started his post by saying that he recently started dating his girlfriend and attending dinner with her and her family. She warned him beforehand that some of the men in her family are big on being “macho” and like to “test” the people who bring home the women in their family. They are also very proud of their Italian heritage.
While eating, they commented on his height, beard and shaved head. They also joked about his IT job but suddenly stopped when the OP told them how much he earns.
The Redditor wrote: “It wasn’t a bad experience overall, just a not-so-pleasant one. Anyway, her older brother kept pushing things, giving me exceptional amounts of s**t for playing Lacrosse in HS (apparently It’s a sport for prudish rich kids and not masculine like football or baseball, he ended his diatribe by saying, “Hey, we’re just a big Italian family, we’re loud and tell it how we see it! Hahaha!” and the whole family except my girlfriend laughed.
“So the next minute I responded to everything they said in Italian. My friend buried her head in shame, the grandfather laughed and everyone else continued to look at each other confused before telling me they didn’t speak Italian. I replied ‘then use you Italian descent as an excuse to behave badly if you don’t even speak the language.’ They got angry, but the grandfather told them everything that I was right and that I should shut up,” he continued.
The OP clarified that his girlfriend was not ashamed of what he was doing, she was ashamed of how her family treated him. In the end she sided with him. However, the men in his girlfriend’s male relatives considered him a “clever jerk” and “respected them and their manhood in an unforgivable way.”
News week contacted u/aitaITAM1990 for comment.
Italian is the fifth most studied foreign language in America, via babbel.com. The top two states with the most Italian-speaking citizens are New York and New Jersey.
Have you always wanted to learn to speak Italian? Memrise, FluentU, Online Italian Club, Duolingo, Give Lingua, ItalianPod101, Language Transfer, and Open Learn are just a few of the many websites and apps that can help you learn the language.
Meeting your partner’s family for the first time can be very nerve-wracking and a huge step in your relationship. Ask your partner for help beforehand by asking what their parents like to do, including hobbies, brides magazine advises. When you meet them, avoid sensitive topics that you wouldn’t want to bring up the first time. Make sure to ask questions to get to know them better and always remember to be yourself.
Redditors were quick to comment in defense of the OP.
“[Laughing out loud] [not the a**hole]. Grandpa knows! He probably half-rolls his eyes every time they say they’re Italian, knowing he’s the last speaker. You close them in the most epic/appropriate way possible! Your girlfriend should be proud to show off the fact that her boyfriend is more Italian than anyone else,” wrote u/bigbrainvirus, which received the best comment with more than 25,000 votes.
u/splbm said: “[Laughing my a** off]- the sheer cruelty of what you said and did is so gold. You totally won the heart of your girlfriend’s grandfather (I wish I had a grandfather like that, but mine is a… [a**hole]). You and your girlfriend are lucky to have each other. [Not the a**hole]- Sending good vibes.”
“[Not the a**hole]“They brought it on themselves. They tried their best to take you down and you defended yourself the best you could. You have the grandfather’s respect for this and mine. You should not let others walk all over you or they will continue to do so in the future. They must be the ones who realize they owed just as much, if not more,” noted u/DoItForTacos.
U/darthness exclaimed, “[Not the a**hole] They tried to talk a big game and looked like fools. That’s theirs. Good job!”
“[Not the a**hole] you have destroyed a foundation of their poisonous masculinity. What they tried to do to you. Good on you,” you/Bonecup wrote.